Communication – A Two-way Street
No relationship can survive without good communication, for that is the bedrock upon which a bond is built with each other. Communication has to be worked at, it doesn’t just happen, and it is part of the commitment that you make to each other. Make it a habit to set aside certain times to be with each other, a time that you can use to ‘catch up’ with things which have happened in your lives.
If necessary, book a date with your spouse on a regular basis so that you have uninterrupted time to talk. Take each of your children out on a date individually and plan outings that will honor and please that child. It means so much to children to have the individual attention of their parents, away from their siblings. This will enable you to connect with each child in a deeper spiritual connection that is impossible within a mixed family environment.
Spend time alone with God in prayer, to form a deeper bond with your Creator. Spend time with yourself to re-charge your batteries and get to know yourself more intimately. It is remarkable how many people don’t know what they think and feel, because they have never had the time or have never thought about thinking about themselves. They keep their schedule so crowded so that they don’t have to spend time with themselves, and even when alone often their hand reaches out to switch on the radio or the TV to drown out the silence. We all need silence and quiet time alone to really think things through. Often just the practice of time spent alone will bring insights and answers that will often surprise you. Try it.
LAW OF CAUSE AND EFFECT
IT’S A FUNNY THING BUT TRUE
It’s a funny thing but true,
The folks you don’t like, don’t like you.
I don’t know why this should be so
But just the same I always know,
That when I’m sour, friends are few,
When I’m friendly, folks are too.
I sometimes get up in the morn,
Awishin’ I was never born,
And then I make cross remarks, a few,
And then my family wishes, too,
That I had gone some other place,
But then I change my little tune,
And sing and smile,
And then the folks around me sing and smile.
I guess ‘twas catching all the while.
It’s a funny thing but true,
The folks you like, they sure like you!
People tend to reflect back to us what they see in us, whether it is friendliness or irritation and anger. To control what you receive back, in most cases you only need to control your own disposition. (This is not so 100% of the time, as the other person may be in a heightened state of aggravation before you came on the scene, or may be mentally ill). As we have said before, you cannot control the other person’s actions or reactions, only your own, but in most cases your disposition is reflected back to you.
If you become angry with a teenager and rant and rave, the teenager will immediately react with his or her own anger, and the situation can escalate into a serious condition where both of you can say things you don’t mean and later regret. Instead, if you keep calm, listen attentively to what they have to say, and speak in a low, measured voice, usually this will take the heat out of any situation. Control your negative emotions and practice your positive traits and this will be reflected back to you.